Dancing with Addiction
Watching Reality T.V shows like ‘Intervention’ and a variety of other shows that demonstrate the extreme effects of addiction, you would likely perceive addiction as a phenomenon where someone is solely dependent on a substance to function ‘normally’. You might watch these types of shows and think ‘Shame’. But would you ever think twice about what you’re addicted to? Have you ever considered what you’re addicted to? You might not need it every day, you might not even think about it for a while, until something or someone triggers it.
Addiction lives in all of us. Ancestrally, we carry patterns from our ancestors that manifest as addiction. Defining addiction a little differently, ‘Addiction is where you are dependent on a substance, a behaviour or person to feel okay. It is the urge to avoid or escape when discomfort or pain comes up in our body and emotions – especially when we don’t understand it.’ Addiction can be needing a cup of coffee first thing in the morning before being able to start your day, needing junk food to fulfill THAT feeling, it can be your hard drugs, a relationship that you NEED to be in, it can show up as the need to be busy and working all the time. Addiction is a sneaky little snake. In the same breath, having coping mechanisms for short periods of time can be helpful in difficult situations. In this world that we live in, who doesn’t have a crutch these days? Even something like spirituality, which is perceived as positive, is a crutch of sorts. A funny part of addiction is that underneath a lot of the pain might be the fear of oneness, the fear of your own power, the fear of death, the fear of the afterlife and then behind this might be the simple gentle acceptance of what is.
So how do we get real? How do we get to this gentle space of acceptance? How do we give space for detoxing our addictive patterns – how do we dance with the plague of addiction and why is this important?
Addictive patterns keep us stuck in the same cycle of crap. It’s important to challenge our own patterns of addiction in order to heal. Not only to heal ourselves but to heal generations of built up trauma and pain. Healing this is a start to healing the planet, which is in a tad bit of trouble if you haven’t noticed. Working through the layers of pain and fear to get to a point of acceptance, self-love and whatever else, is part of the process. It’s definitely a journey. So how can you dance with addiction?
Start by being honest with yourself. Look at what your crutches are, how they developed and why they’re there. Write them down if you need to.
Switch it up – remove a substance or behaviour from your life for 40 days, implement something different in your routine that can clear your head, approach a relationship in a different way, try a different response to a person/situation. Switching things up gives the heart space to breathe and be open, simultaneously challenging the mind to form new, healthier thought patterns.
Sit with it. Even if it’s for 10 minutes a day, dedicate that time to sit and breathe into the feelings that make you want to run. Cry, scream, journal and laugh even.
Find support. Whether it’s counselling, reiki, church, massage, talking to a good friend – find support. Find a way to communicate honestly what’s happening inside of you.
Lastly, see it all as a dance. We are dancing through this life – sometimes it’s a tango, sometimes your rhythm feels out of balance and other times it’s blissful and joyful. The point is to keep moving and embrace each moment as it is.